I got a text from back home that Caliban Academy won its first match in the most unusual way. Leona Mangle was hurt and was taken to the hospital, and her boyfriend Edgar was forced to see his first varsity action ever. Amazingly he actually took down a boar that seemed to win the game, but by roaring he was penalized for “Excessive Celebration.” That’s a penalty that was created because post-kill celebrations were getting out of hand. (For instance, teams would completely debone the carcass and reassemble the bones into a funny and/or degrading pose.) It was mainly felines who did that, since they often play with their food.
In recent years, though, officials are calling the penalty for virtually any display of enthusiasm. It’s not what the rule was supposed to do, and it detracts from the sport. Fortunately, in this case the team won anyway when Leona’s ambulance hit a deer that had earlier fled the field of play.
Meanwhile, here at the lab we’re still wondering what the stem cell funding ruling will mean for us since Federal grants make much of our research possible. While in many cases they don’t pay the total cost, they’re frequently a springboard to other funding sources. A freeze would halt a lot of promising studies that could alleviate much sickness and suffering. For now, all we can do is wait and see what happens next.
This week's question: In human sporting contests, how do teams celebrate?

Everyone in my department was shocked this week when a federal judge halted all funding for stem cell research, including the work I’m doing in combating disease. We had all thought this issue had been settled last year with the new guidelines, so this development was like a predator leaping upon us unawares.
For those of you not in the field, embryonic stem cell holds promise for curing a host of ills such as Parkinson’s and diabetes. We use adult stem cells in our research as well, but at the stage we’re in we need to have a full range of options at our disposal. This ruling not only turns back the clock to where we stood last year, but goes even further. It also denies funding for projects that were allowed by the previous administration.
Thankfully the President is challenging the ruling but if it stands the funding will be halted by the end of September. Yes, that includes my research as well, which goes on until then.
I know I rarely mention my research in this blog, mainly because the developments that take place are ones I reserve for scientific journals. I don’t want competitors stealing my work! Of course, it’s the competition from other countries that are the main beneficiaries of this ruling. I’m sure they’d be delighted to have the playing field for themselves.
Sorry about the rant.

The university lab is open and guess what! I have my own office! Such coolness. It even has my name Lindesfarne Dewclaw on the door. (It’s in a much smaller font than my neighbor Mai Qi.)
Being a first year grad student I’m not assigned to teach any classes yet, so I don’t have any students that would be visiting my office. That’ll come, though. In the meantime, having an office means I don’t have to schlep all of my personal research back and forth from Tree every day. Some of the grad students are species that are pack animals, but no one has ever accused a hedgehog of being one of those.
Fenton’s first class of the semester is on Monday. He’s impressed a lot of his professors with his computer skills, and since they all have tech backgrounds they have a lot of industry connections. A number of them have encouraged him to seek employment in one of the nation’s tech centers after graduation, but I don’t see that happening. He’s always put career advancement behind personal relationships, and with Tree putting down roots here, so has he.
Back home, Rudy’s hunting team was heavily hit by graduation so he has to get Edgar the Lion to where he can contribute. That’s a tall order, and he and Fiona had the idea of having Edgar mentored by Mr. Mangle. The upside: Mr. Mangle is a rarity; a male lion who is not only an effective hunter but who also takes pride in it despite his species’ gender conventions. The downside: Edgar is dating Mr. Mangle’s daughter Leona, so there’s the element of suspicion and wariness on both sides. I’ll try to come home for the hunting matches on Friday nights this fall to see how it plays out.
I'm guessing that you humans don't literally hunt each other. Do you have a sport played by high schools on Friday nights?

Classes start at Beige University start later this week, and the campus is buzzing as the multitudes arrive. It’s nice living here permanently and not being a part of that mass chaos. I remember it all too well from my undergraduate days.
Rhonda and Quinn are somewhat jealous of Fenton and I; their Family Housing dorm is okay, but I’ll be the first to admit that there’s nothing like having a place of one’s own, especially when you can have intelligent conversations with it. I say that even after last week’s “bite mark” incident.
Rachel is still in our old dorm but now she’s joined by her girlfriend, the equine Joan Hoof who is now a freshman here. I’m happy for them since they’ve been apart for so long, but that also comes with concern. Both of them need to focus on their studies, and living with a romantic partner for the first time may be an immense distraction. I’ll keep a close eye on how they’re doing academically.
As for me, I’m excited about my graduate studies. I’ll be working under Professor Antlerhead as before, and the genetic research we’re going is compelling. I almost feel like camping out outside the lab, waiting for the doors to open.
Fenton’s still taking undergraduate computer classes, but almost perfunctorily. He still sees his real focus as working for Hare-Link, and his decision to enroll here in the first place was mainly to be with me. He enjoys the milieu, though, and he said he’ll be happy living here even after he gets his degree.
Gotta go; I have to spend an insane amount of money on dead tree versions of textbooks. I’d rather pay the authors directly for digital editions! To all of you human college students reading this, when do your classes start?

First, sorry about the technical difficulties with last week’s blog. Next, I’d like to address my somewhat judgmental previous posting about Kell’s cousin Sheila. I may have been too harsh in my assessment, as I really don’t know her. She moved to Domain while I was at Beige, so I’ve really just based my opinion of her on what I’ve heard from Kell. As an adult, I shouldn’t let secondhand information be my only source before I go shooting off my mouth.
This leads to the story of what happens when I woke up last weekend. As usual, I was in my bed with the puncture-resistant sheets, and Fenton hung from the ceiling. The window next to the bed was open to let in the fresh air.
At 5:00 p.m. (which we refer to as “morning” when it’s just the two of us talking), I went into the bathroom where I noticed what looked for all the world like two bite marks. My imagination went into hyperdrive, and for five minutes I panicked at the idea that Fenton had inherited his vampirism from his mother, and had fed off me.
Tree set me straight. She had reached into the room through the window in order to place pine cones in my quills so that I would unwittingly distribute them. In doing so, her needles had caused the wounds on my neck. (We’ve been giving her pine cones to Mr. Squirrel and his family, but I think Tree figured out that they were just being eaten and came up with this alternative.)
Fenton and I were able to laugh about it a few moments later, but it still wasn’t my finest hour. As a scientist I’m supposed to be above letting fear and suspicion take over so easily...as it did for those who didn’t show up at my wedding. Maybe I’m not so different from them after all.
Am I?

Due to a personal matter. Thx for your patience.

With the summer still quiet before this university town wakes up (and the two of us settling into our new marital state), I’ll report on what’s going on back in Domain with Kell and her cousin Sheila.
Only recently did Sheila become a real presence in the family’s life; before that she’d been this shadowy figure of rumor and tall tales. It turned out that those outlandish stories were only partially embellished by Kell and Elanor, and that she really is as eccentric as advertised. She sees herself as a “seeker,” but that seems to be a self-rationalization for a past that’s careened through myriad reinventions without adding to the development of genuine inner growth. I hate to say this, but for someone in her late thirties she strikes me as being a teenager...and the absolute antithesis of Kell.
And now Sheila is in a very serious relationship with Frank Mangle. I noticed that at my wedding reception that they were quite lovey-dovey...but that the body language of Frank’s daughter Leona was pretty uncomfortable. I chalked that up to Leona being in the presence of Rhonda. (Rhonda used to date Leona’s current BF Edgar...and that awkwardness was the reason Edgar wasn’t at the wedding. Of all the no-shows, at least he had an excuse!)
According to Kell, Leona is very protective of her single Dad, and I can relate. She wants to make sure Sheila is the right choice for him. It would help Sheila immensely to cultivate a relationship with Leona, but she’s neglected that. With Kell’s insistence she’s trying to play catch-up on that score.
Today's question is a personal one: do you think I'm being too judgmental about Sheila?

Missives from home tell me that Kell’s hunting woes were a temporary thing (as I’d suspected) and that she got her timing back in short order. It will still be interesting to see how she and Desdemona get along as partners, being mothers-in-law and all. Come to think of it, Fenton and I should probably be concerned. Hunting involves lots of sitting around waiting for prey to come along, so that copious downtime will likely be filled with conversation about us.
Shudder
Thanks to all the readers last week who offered decorating suggestions! First, both Fenton and I do have separate offices within Tree that neither of us touch. Fenton’s is essentially his “bat cave” as someone pointed out. Someone else offered a Steampunk idea, but as much as I like “Girl Genius” that’s not really my style.
About my reference last week to 40-minute showers, yes, a 40-minute bath would be just as effective and would save water. Tree will also be aware of 40-minute intervals between when the faucet stops running and the water is let out.
It’s quiet here at Beige University. The summer classes have ended, and the fall semester (which includes my first Masters degree courses) begins in four weeks. Since this is a “university town” with little here besides the school, one can easily imagine tumbleweeds blowing down the streets. That’s fine; it’s given Fenton and I space to acclimate ourselves to our new life before a whirlwind of activity descends upon us.
Today's question for those of you in school: How are you spending your summer?

Okay, Fenton didn't exactly carry me across the threshold when we returned from our honeymoon. He flies me around so much on a daily basis, it would've been redundant.
The first thing we discovered when we got home was a privacy situation. Now, I've been living here since early this year, but I always slept in a bed while Fenton hung from the ceiling, so there was no...intimacy involved. Now there is. swoon
Except Tree is aware of every movement occurring within her system, including things we'd rather keep between the two of us. After some initial consternation we told Tree about our concerns and she had no problem respecting our wishes.
Basically it's this: Anytime the shower runs for over 40 minutes, Tree shuts off her awareness functions in the bedroom. "Nuff said.
The rest of my week was spent sending Thank You notes to those who gave us gifts...including the ones who bailed at the wedding. I hope those people feel guilty about not coming...and that a sweet, cordial Thank You note from me twists the knife a little more.
As I write this, I'm taking a break from redecorating Tree's interior. Tree and I have actually been concocting this ever since the engagement.
My question: Any decorating suggestions?

No typo; I’m happy that Fenton and I will be dependent on each other forever.
It’s the last day of our honeymoon. We’ve packed up and are ready to check out of our rental unit for the flight back home. (No, Fenton won’t be carrying me that far! We’ll be on a commercial airliner.)
We’ve had a wondrous time here in Silicon Valley, but we’re eager to get home and start our new life. I told Fenton about a weird dream I had in which I turned into a bat, and he allowed that he had one about becoming a hedgehog. A sign of unity, I guess!
The big news was back in Domain where Fenton’s mom was fired from her office job and almost immediately hired by Herd Thinners, Inc. Her new title Liquid Assets Collector - Junior Level. It doesn’t pay as much as her old position, but she’s grateful to work in the place that accepts her for who she really is, and where she doesn’t have to live a lie. I know she’ll be a highly motivated employee, which I’m sure is another reason R.L. took her on.
She was paired with Kell who, true to her Type A form, tried to come back from her injury before getting her hunting timing back. This could have ended badly, as even one case of Not Meeting Daily Quota on an employee profile can have devastating results for a Staff Predator. Desdemona, however, had a unique but effective solution. (Kell just had to take care to rest and maintain hydration for the next 24 hours.)
Being in flight, we'll miss the Fourth of July fireworks. To my American readers, how do you celebrate today?

We're still enjoying the honeymoon, decompressing from the drama which seems to have been a constant presence for us since we announced the wedding date. Considering all the things that have happened, including Tree's near-death experience in the flood and the revelation of Fenton's mom's vampirism, a few days free of stress is a relief.
We're on a package tour of Silicon Valley, and a bus takes us around to all of the legendary sites of geekdom. I'm usually the only female on the bus, and I can tell that the other passengers assume I'm an ignorant companion of Fenton. I make a point of asking the guide the most difficult questions I can think of. Then Fenton asks a difficult question, and I answer it.
We made a few friends on the tour, and spread the word about Hare Link. We've eaten at some romantic seaside restaurants, with nicely salty insects. There's one more week before we go home, and we feels there's lots more to see.
We're sending pictures back to Tree to upload into our home computer. She missed the wedding, of course, but we brought along a small part of her: a thimbleful of her sap.
To all of the married folks here: where did you honeymoon?

I’m writing this from the quiet of our hotel just off Hwy. 101 in the friendly conclave of Silicon Valley, the technology capitol of the world. (Yes, I know there are other areas that would dispute that, but that’s what makes for entertaining arguments. And Lord knows, the net is nothing if not good for conducting arguments.)
We’re taking a deep breath after the high drama of the wedding day and night. The total guest list ended up at about 80, with roughly 40 on each side of the aisle. Dad, in particular, raised the total by calling in some favors, At the last minute he cajoled folks to attend who weren’t initially on the guest list, namely his fellow school board members and the entire Rabbit Council. As for the rest, well, as I said before, now I know who my true friends are.
Dr. Caduceus is doing well. He has full feeling in all parts of his tail and will be released from the county hospital in a day or two. Another doctor has arrived in town to see his patients until he’s back on his...um...stomach. That was a freak injury he suffered, and the hospital confirmed his self-diagnosis that Fenton’s mom saved him from permanent paralysis.
For so long I’d harbored resentment against Desdemona’s incessant pressure to get me to marry her son. Of course, that pushiness was based on her fear of me finding out that she is a vampire bat. With everything out in the open now I can start a relationship with her on fresh terms.
Right now, though, Fenton and I are going to relax and enjoy our honeymoon. And I feel quite relaxed.

I only have time for a quick text. Just before the ceremony was supposed to begin (at midnight), a serious injury occurred to the town’s only general practitioner, Dr. Caduceus. A branch from the church’s tree broke off, falling on him as he was able to enter.
Being a doctor, he was quickly able to diagnose what was happening to him as he slowly began losing feeling in the lower part of his tail. The gradual nature of this (as opposed to immediately losing sensation) told him that while he had no broken bones, a large bruise was causing swelling that was pressing on his spinal cord.
Someone needed to relieve that pressure right away, or else the paralysis might be permanent. That’s when a certain vampire bat volunteered her services.
Desdemona asked her bat family to use their sonar on Dr. Caduceus to locate the exact spot of the swelling. Triangulating their sound waves, they found right where she should drain the fluid. That, she did expertly and precisely. His feeling began returning soon after, to everyone’s relief.
The doctor’s been taken to the hospital where the staff will evaluate him and keep him overnight. Now, we’re all regrouping for the start of my wedding.
Whew!

It’s dawn, and we’ve just returned from the Fuscus household where Desdemona came clean about her true species. We’re tolerant of Vampire-Americans, but unfortunately word is spreading all over town to the less enlightened citizenry due to the gossipy flea network.
Looking back, I now see how Desdemona’s success in keeping her diet hidden from even her own offspring actually undermined her relationship with Fenton. The elaborate subterfuge resulted in her becoming emotionally distant, and with Fenton actually establishing an alternate maternal bond with Tree. There’s a lesson there, I suppose.
I’m going to sleep until about 4:00 in the afternoon, and then the countdown will begin for the wedding beginning at midnight. I had hoped to text regularly, but with this new factor I doubt I’ll be able to post anything new, or reply to comments. Thanks in advance for your understanding!
Last week someone asked about my wedding cake. It’s an insectivore cake, filled with crunchy weevils and maggots. The catering firm also has desserts ready for other diets at the reception.
If you’ve received an invitation, please come! Vampire bats aren’t at all what you think.