TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES

Sunday, August 30. 2009

I’m just about to head off for the fall semester when Grandpa gets arrested...again. (He was caught eating vegetables after a rash of thefts from traps in the predator’s wing of the Fennec boarding house.) Even though active predation is against the lease contract, having passive traps within the rooms is a grey area. What isn’t a grey area is breaking into a room for any purpose, and Grandpa was subsequently taken away.
Despite his long criminal record, this didn’t make sense. As it turned out, Dad and Kell discovered that Grandpa in fact took the vegetables from Dad’s garden. (That’s actually more in character.)
The authorities will need stronger proof of his innocence before releasing him, however, so it’s going to be up to us to catch whoever is really stealing from the traps. Kell did an initial sweep of the boarding house but couldn’t pick up a scent on the floors or carpets. She theorized that the thief might be avian, but what bird likes veggies? Dad will go over to the county lockup to visit Grandpa and try to get him to admit raiding his garden. (For some reason, Grandpa would rather go to prison rather than confess to doing that. He has an interesting personal code of ethics.)
As for myself, as a nocturnal species it’s fallen on me to stake out the boarding house hallways. Wish me luck!
This week's question: how does one pass the time on a stakeout? Suggestions?

Posted by Lindesfarne at 01:51 | Comments (28) | Trackbacks (0)

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Ok This is just my take on it. The purpose of traps is for someone to get caught trying to take the bait. Therefore by setting up the trap the person setting up the trap wants someone to try to take the bait. Therefore it is an invitation to try to take it and not breaking in. The fact that the trap did not succeed is not the fault of the individual who took the bait. The fault lies with the trap itself.
In fact i would go so far as to say it is not fair to prosecute anyone for stealing food from this kind of device. Everyone knows that is entrapment.

#1 pounds on 2009-08-30 03:44 (Reply)

I recommend Douglas Adams, Guy Gavriel Kay, J.R.R. Tolkein and Robert Heinlein.

#2 Selina Grace on 2009-08-30 04:23 (Reply)

If you are alone and cannot talk to someone, try thinking about something that interests you, like genetics. Don't get too involved, though. You might miss something important!

#3 Thomas Mazanec (Link) on 2009-08-30 08:42 (Reply)

What if it isn't a bird? Maybe it's a fruit bat that went vegetarian? Haha, how likely is that, though? As to what to do on a stakeout, I'd bring a radio and maybe some light reading. Distracting, but not so much so that the task at hand couldn't be accomplished.

Good luck in the coming semester!

#4 Steff on 2009-08-30 09:14 (Reply)

A radio on a stakeout would not be a good idea. The perp may hear you, and if your wearing phones, you may not hear them.

#4.1 Mortar on 2009-08-30 22:45 (Reply)

Excellent choices, Selina, but I've read them all already.

#5 Lindesfarne Dewclaw on 2009-08-30 09:26 (Reply)

You've read all of GGK?!! Wow, we're rarities, you and I.

#5.1 Selina Grace on 2009-08-30 23:24 (Reply)

Hello Lindesfarne!
First of all, I don't understand why you are observing the hallways yourself instead of setting up a hidden security camera.

But if you really want to do it the old way, here are some hints:
-since you are noctnural, have enough coffee ready for daytime observations.
-Make sure to have enough supplies at hand, or somebody who can get some snacks in time. There's nothing more annoying than waiting several hours for somebody, making a brake of five minutes to get something to eat, coming back and - find out that your target person was active during that time.
-get an audio book and a diskman with in-ear-monitors, to avoid the audio book getting heared by your target. Reading is inadvisable, since it is too distracting.
-If you like crocheting, it's a good idea to. Knitting is a bad idea, since the needles are quite loud. Other silent handiwork is a good idea, too.

I really hope you get a photo of that thief.
One question: Is it really illegal for a prey species to get food out of traps? I've always thought that fishing out bait is more like a competition between predator and prey like: What's higher evolved - trap or prey aptitude?

#6 Mike O'Hare on 2009-08-30 09:31 (Reply)

I'll be there in person because I hope that a confession will be involved.

As for whether its a crime, it's definitely a fact that the thief is breaking into the tenant's rooms.

#7 Lindesfarne Dewclaw on 2009-08-30 11:03 (Reply)

Bring along Richard Dreyfuss and Emilo Estevez to keep you company. Have you thought about growing a moustache.

If you're smart you'll leave Rosie O'Donnell home even if you end up on Another Stakeout.

If you catch a suspect you could always try some quill-related interrogation.

#8 Elwood Blutarsky on 2009-08-30 11:37 (Reply)

The two things that bother me most about the thefts are 1) Kell couldn't find a scent and 2) there hasn't been anything mentioned about any signs of breaking and entering.

Point 1 would indicate that (given Kell's exceptional scent trailing ability) either that all scents are being masked or, more likely, that the scent is one which belongs at the Fennec's. Point 2 indicates either an experienced thief like your grandfather (unfortunately) or someone who has a key to the rooms.

Assuming Gramp's innocence, the most likely suspect would appear be one of the housekeepers, assuming the Fennecs have them.

As for staying awake, it's always a problem. You need something that will keep you alert but not distract you from your observations. Reading anything will distract your eyes from watching the hallways. Music might be a better option...

#9 Charlieg on 2009-08-30 11:43 (Reply)

Well, when I'm hunting with my family, (or alone) and I'm waiting for pray, I usually count, recount, and continue recounting senarios that could play out in my head. It usually works quite well, and it can also make long days bareable (like school and church).

#10 Adam on 2009-08-30 11:46 (Reply)

I've asked individuals of my acquaitance who have done stakeouts (sheriff's deputies) and they recommend either an mp3 with a LOOONG playlist of heavy-beat music or (if you're with a partner) a chess or other board game. Books aren't recommended on long stakeouts because they can distract you. In either case, some military-grade coffee (not that Starbucks garbage - REAL coffee that's strong enough to use as furniture varnish).

#11 Bookkeeper-At-Arms on 2009-08-30 12:52 (Reply)

One word: Solitaire!

#12 ReFlex76 (Link) on 2009-08-30 13:06 (Reply)

Ditto, but remember not to box-shuffle.

#12.1 golfwidow (Link) on 2009-08-30 15:24 (Reply)

If you want to perform some sort of stakeout, read into Truman Capote's "In Cold Blood" and do what Dick Hickock and Perry Smith did (watch to see if anybody was at the house and then, if it is important, try to catch the person responsible for stealing the vegetables).

As for me, I stake out by listening to the music on the radio, turning it so low that the bass wouldn't attract anybody, preferably of my favorite artists (Captain Beefheart & the Magic Band a big yes for me), and having a bit of a snack while keeping my eye out for whoever wants to come to me or if they are trying to commit a crime.

However, I do not suggest that you do everything else Dick and Perry did in the book. That would not only be wrong, but also very immoral to do such things to people completing their American dream.

#13 S.C. Smith on 2009-08-30 13:49 (Reply)

If your heading back to college, how are you gonna find time to do stakeouts?

#14 Mortar on 2009-08-30 22:53 (Reply)

I won't be heading back to Beige for another week. We hope the matter is resolved by then.

#14.1 Lindesfarne Dewclaw on 2009-08-30 22:56 (Reply)

This sounds more like still-hunting in our world. You want nothing that'll tip off your prey that you're around. If they have keen ears, that means music; keen eyes, any sort of movement. Music in the next room would work, but low volume music can lull you to sleep.

Afraid there's nothing much to do but keep alert the best you can by continually staying in tune with your surroundings.

You might also want to consider what you will do if the culprit is a species adept at stealing food. Say, one with a bushy tail, is arboreal, and recently wed a species that eats vegetables?

#15 Harry on 2009-08-30 23:32 (Reply)

it could be that he'd rather it be thought that he stole from strangers rather then raid his own child's garden. fewer things are considered lower then stealing form your own children in some species.

#16 e_voyager on 2009-08-31 00:07 (Reply)

Okay, what doesn't make sense to me is, why bother with the traps at all? If breaking in is illegal, presumably it won't happen very often, and any attempted break-ins can by foiled by a good set of locks, not to mention the fact that the burglar would first have to break into the boarding house itself, and then into the individual rooms. So if only the tenant and any guests enter their rooms, one would suppose that the tenant wouldn't want their guests being trapped, and if they did, that falls under active predation, which is against their lease. So, why have the traps? Unless they were all trying to catch your grandpa, or vegetarian burglars, it seems like an exercise in futility. Hope that makes sense.

#17 Mamakitty on 2009-08-31 00:11 (Reply)

You forget, in their world (or yours, curse internet anonmaty), Preditors themselfs are the 'best defence' for a house if they are light sleepers. The traps are set in hopes of catching a theif so they can have a late night snack.

At least, that's my guess.

#17.1 Adam on 2009-08-31 08:22 (Reply)

Lindesfarne, you of all people should know not to question the idea of a bird liking veggies. Your family has some unusual species-diet combos.

#18 Classic Steve (Link) on 2009-08-31 11:06 (Reply)

Lots of birds like veggies. I just brought home a quaker parrot. I was told and found out that he should have Veggies every day.

#19 pz dUDE on 2009-08-31 13:55 (Reply)

As for ways to pass time on a stakeout, I would certainly agree that music is pretty effective. You don't have to turn it up very loud: just enough to provide some background (with one ear free for surveillance).

Bring a bag of snacks, of course: nothing too crunchy (exoskeletons are rather noisy, as you'll have noticed)..... and crickets are definitely out of the question.....

While it may seem paradoxical to have traps in a locked room, consider that there may be "undocumented" residents in the house - particularly mice. They can squeeze through cracks that most of us consider impassable; so they don't have to 'break' to 'enter'. Perhaps Martha ought to check between the walls - or hire a snake as a rent collector.

It's lucky I have good neighbors, or my garden might be bare, too. We have an agreement: for fellow herbivores, it's a gift of any surplus I have. For carnivores, any thief they can catch... 7@=e

#20 Lucius Appaloosius on 2009-08-31 20:56 (Reply)

Maybe you should set up some targets and use your quills for a bit of target practice. You can't be rusty with a thief running around.

#21 Josh b on 2009-09-01 22:53 (Reply)

Oh man, I've had the same thing with my father. Except he stole jewelry from a dead royal person. Oh yeah, and for your question, I suggest reading a book. Any book you have, I guess. I'm not really much of a book reader myself. >_>;

#22 Scythe Jakolin on 2009-09-05 22:17 (Reply)

Security cameras cost money and still need monitoring, tape units also cost money.

Never been on a stake out, I'm a rent a guard. But some posts are just boring. Getting 2 others sometimes helps, but man power is also expensive. (2 or 4 will just play cards and miss the action).

Books: recommend Lois McMasters Bujold, Terry Pratchet, and (change genre) Sharron McCrumb. Also Elizabeth Moon, Mercedes Lackey. Do not do Pratchet sci-fi.

Sea

#23 seanearlyaug on 2009-11-07 19:37 (Reply)

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